I like themes, schemes, and gimmicky gimmicks.
Birthday celebrations are no different.
You've sucessfully lived past the life expectancy age of most third world countries and that calls for a party of epic proportions!
In honor of your 35th birthday I'd like to present to you: A Tool Trifecta Prize Pack!
Henry the Hoover is good, clean, and more importantly portable fun!
Got suction? Well, now you do! Also included is a shiny new knob upgrade which you can Hoover anytime, anyplace, with reckless abandon.
Here's my latest political campaign speech: And as your Imperialistic Ruler Supreme I would make sure to provide countless cock suckers for the cock-suckerless through a planned
Cock Suckers United intiative funded by the Lickety Split Society.
And finally, a versatile hand-knitted koozie set specially designed to keep your banana as toasty warm as a Bananas Foster Flambe! Especially good for nippy nights down at the White Moon nudist colony when you want to keep that jerkface Jack Frost from nipping at more than just your nose!
Birthday celebrations are no different.
You've sucessfully lived past the life expectancy age of most third world countries and that calls for a party of epic proportions!
In honor of your 35th birthday I'd like to present to you: A Tool Trifecta Prize Pack!
Henry the Hoover is good, clean, and more importantly portable fun!
Got suction? Well, now you do! Also included is a shiny new knob upgrade which you can Hoover anytime, anyplace, with reckless abandon.
Here's my latest political campaign speech: And as your Imperialistic Ruler Supreme I would make sure to provide countless cock suckers for the cock-suckerless through a planned
Cock Suckers United intiative funded by the Lickety Split Society.
And finally, a versatile hand-knitted koozie set specially designed to keep your banana as toasty warm as a Bananas Foster Flambe! Especially good for nippy nights down at the White Moon nudist colony when you want to keep that jerkface Jack Frost from nipping at more than just your nose!
Next year shall be declared a "Jubilee" birthday where mirthful joy shall spill abundantly as a chocolate fountain at a wedding recpetion that somebody spiked with rum.
There's a definite possibility of a painted Wipie Warmer going on the list of potential presents.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHAWN!!!
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